THIS IS IN MY MARQUEE

Funny laws





The unavoidable laws of the natural universe!!!!


1. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee. 
2. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. 
3. Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. 
4. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal. 
5. Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire. 
6. Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time). 
7. Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings. 
8. Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. 
9. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will. 
10. Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. 
11. Theater Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last. 
12. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. 
13. Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers. 
14. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness, color and cost of the carpet/rug. 
15. Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are. 
16. Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about. 
17. Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly. 
18. Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet. 
19. Wilson's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.